The Expendables 2 (2012)

n

nTitle: The Expendables 2 (2012)

n

nDirector: Simon West  

n

nCast: Sylvester Stallone, ArnoldnSchwarzenegger, Bruce Willis, Jason Statham, Jean-Claude Van Damme, Dolph Lundgren,nJet Li, Chuck Norris, Randy Couture, Terry Crews, Charisma Carpenter, Nan Yu

n

nReview:

n

nAre you ready for a shot of testosterone? Actually, annoverdose of testosterone? Because that’s exactly what your going to get with ThenExpendables 2, a film with big muscle tanks, shooting and blowing up everythingnthat comes in their paths. After all the death and destruction, they all go forna little bit of male bonding and hang out at their favorite biker bar to smokena couple of stogies and chug down a couple of beers. This is the kind of filmsnwhere if you ask a question, they’ll answer it with bullets.

n

n

nThis time around, there isn’t much of a story, but the basicnpremise goes something like this: the villainous villain named ‘Vilain’ (yup!)nhas found a hidden cache of plutonium worth about four million dollars. He isnusing the people of a small town as slaves in order to dig and recover thenhidden plutonium. The Expendables are then contacted by a government officialnnamed ‘Church’ to try and stop him. This mission should be a walk in the parknfor them, but could Vilain end up being more of a villain than they bargainednfor?

n

n

nSo yeah, this movie put a big smile on my face for the wholendamn ride. I went to see these aging action stars from the eighties blow stuffnup; and they did it very well, in this aspect, the film didn’t disappoint onenbit. There’s whole chunks of this film simply dedicated to machine guns beingnfired none stop for minutes on end. I mean, this movie gets loud! How loud?nWell, in the first ten minutes of the film they blow up a helicopter, a tank, ancouple of buildings and massacre god knows how many henchmen. They shoot guns,nbazookas, machine guns, shot guns, you name it and it gets fired, and that’snjust in the opening of the film which by the way is pretty bombastic. Theynreally wanted to open up the film with a bang! It’s a great opening scenenbecause all these aging action stars seem to be having the time of their lives;nthese characters don’t have a care in their minds, it feels as if these guysnshoot their guns knowing that they are invincible.

n

n

nWhich is really part of the films charm, we know they aren’tngoing to die, we know they are going to blow everything up, beat up the bad guy,nsave the day and get the girl! It’s how they go about it that counts; it’s thenattitude they carry while they do it that matters. In the opening sequence, ThenExpendables drive around this truck that has a sign that reads ‘Bad Attitude’nand that says it all right there. The fun of watching this movie is reallynwatching these old dudes we grew up with kicking some ass and cracking jokesnwhile doing it. Half of the fun is listening to the banter as they make fun ofneach other and their action star careers. One of the funniest moments hasnArnold and Willis stealing each others catch phrases! Hilarious in deed. Chuck Norrisngot a big audience reaction when he appeared on screen, but the same happenednwith all of them. The first time we see Arnold, a smile creeped up on my face when he says “this is embarassing”, his appearance in the film is like an unvailing, the first of many surprises to come for 80’s action fans. The film grabs you from the very beginning, once you see these guys having so much fun tearing up the place, you just know this is going to be a fun ride. The ‘One That Hasn’t Aged So Well Award’ goes to Jean-Claude Van Damme, who looks like crap when he takes off his glasses, which is probably why he wears them for a huge part of the film and in contrast,  the ‘Aging Gracefully Award’ goes to Dolph Lundgren, who looks pretty much the same he’s always looked, but with a really funny attitude, sam as in the first film, he’s character is one of the best things about this sequel. Lundgren should be making more theatrical action films in my opinion. 

n

n

nStory wise the film is fluffy, and when I say fluffy I meannit really doesn’t even matter. The whole business with the plutonium is just annexcuse for blowing shit up; which is fine I guess. I started to wonder what anfilm like this one would be like if it had a more serious tone to it, but Inguess it wouldn’t be what it is if it was more serious in tone. What we like aboutnthese films is the goofiness; it reminds us how silly action movies from the 80’snwhere and how much fun they were to watch. Ever sat down to watch Cobra (1986)nor Invasion U.S.A.(1985)? These films are unintentionally hilarious; whichnmeans they weren’t made to be funny, back in the day that’s just the way actionnfilms were. These films where filled with nonsensical plot lines,nindestructible heroes and huge amounts of violence. That’s what the eightiesnaction films where all about, and that’s exactly what you get with ThenExpendables 2.

n

n

nOn the downside, Chuck Norris walks in and out of the movienin five minutes. It’s great to see him appear and make a few jokes about himnbeing ‘The Lonewolf’ but I wish he’d been a more integral part of the film,nsame goes for Jet Li who is in the film only for the opening sequence, thoughnhe does have his moment to shine. I guess theres so many characters that somenof them have to be sacrificed in the altar of screen time. Still, this film is bigger, louder and more explosive then the first Expendables film. I’m looking forwardnto the inevitable sequel, which considering how muchnmoney this ones making at the box office is a sure thing. I hear they are goingnto try and get Clint Eastwood and Nicholas Cage to appear in the film whichnwould be awesome, let’s hope it happens. Steven Segal’s also been M.I.A. innthis series. Also, I hope Wesley Snipes gets out of jail in time to make it fornthe next sequel as well, I have to say he’s been sorely missed in this series.nAll in all, Expendables 2 is a solid slice of 80’s style action, recommend itnfor a night of mindless, nostalgic fun.  

n

nRating: 4 out of 5

n

n