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nTitle: Oasis of the Zombies (1982)
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nDirector: Jesus Franco
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nReview:
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nThere are a couple of zombie movies out there thatnare complete bore fests in which very little happens in the way of action ornsuspense. It seems to me that filmmakers who do these types of films make them to make some quick cash, so they can move onnto something else they want to do. The trick to making money with these typesnof movies is to make the cheapest possible zombie movie you can and I meannreally cheap, all talk, no action, no gore, and very little in the way of make-upneffects work, this way you spend very little in making your film and have anbetter chance at making back your budget. Then, the second part of the plot involvesnmaking the masses believe they are going to see a zombie fest, the greatestnzombie film ever made. This is usually achieved by getting a really cool posternfor your shitty film and by cutting a trailer that shows only the zombienscenes. Normally what we end up with in this type of situation is a reallyncrappy film, but a cool as hell poster. Most of the time, the poster is betternthan the film. Then sit back and wait for the ka-shing!, if all goes well, you’llnhave made your money back because once you’ve managed to get your audience innthe theater seats, they have already paid the ticket; their money is yours! Thenmost notable example of this type of sleazy filmmaking would be the Nazi zombienfilm Zombie Lake (1981) and the film I’ll be talking about today: Oasis of thenZombies (1982), which consequently is also a Nazi zombie film; barely anyways.
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nThis film concerns a rich kid named Robert whosenfather is killed in Africa after he reveals the location of a treasure to somengreedy bastard. When Robert reads into his father’s diary he discovers that hisnfather actually knew the location of a gold treasure worth six million dollars,na treasure that used to belong to the Germans, but they all died in a firefightndefending the gold, so know the gold is supposedly still buried somewhere in annOasis in the middle of the African desert. So Robert decides that taking hisnfriends with him on an expedition to find the gold will be a great idea! Sonmuch for mourning the death of your father! So anyways, these kids take off fornAfrica to get the gold, unfortunately for them, Nazi zombies are protecting thengold! Will they find the gold, or will they instead find themselves?
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nHere’s a question I often times ask myself whennwatching a film like Oasis of the Zombies, when filmmakers make a movie likenthis one, do they know they are making an extremely boring movie? Are they evennaware of it? Are they making a boring film on purpose? Or do they think theynare actually making an entertaining flick? Thing is that this movie actuallynhas an interesting premise and back story to it, but it somehow still managesnto deviate into an extremely boring movie. For example, the movie starts outnwith these two hot chicks stopping at the titular Oasis to refresh themselves,nand since the camera focuses very sleazily on their bee-hinds, you get tonthinking cool, we’re gonna get some hot lesbo action. This isn’t a chavanisticnthought on my part, I only come to this conclusion because this is a Jesus Franco film,nand Lesbo action is one of the elements his films are known for. So anyhow, younfigure these two chicks are gonna get naked and THEN get eaten by zombies. Anvery similar scene happens in Zombie Lake as well, and since the same filmmakersnare involved in this film I thought they’d go with the same ‘modus operandi’,nbut no, we only get a pair of zombie hands emerging from the sand and attackingnthe girls. Worst part is the whole attack happens off camera! So right there andnthen we know, this movie is shying away from showing us the goods in more ways thannone, no naked chicks and on top of that, no zombies.
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nThis flick was seriously trying to cut back on costsnin another way: the zombies only come out at night for some reason that’s nevernmentioned in the film. But I’ll tell you the reason: they only come out at night because it’s anneffective way for the filmmakers to hide a lot of the cheap make up effects orneven better, it’s an effective way to hide the fact that there’s no make upneffects whatsoever! For some shots they simply show ominous looking shadowsnwalking about! Wow, so I’m no Jesus Franco expert, but this must not be hisnbest film. There’s huge gaping plot holes on this one, for example: fine, there’sna lost cache of gold somewhere in the dessert and the Nazi’s who it used tonbelong to are now zombies…who guard the gold…for what purpose? This is the samenquestion I asked myself when watching John Carpenter’s The Fog (1980). Fine,nthe ghosts are hiding in the fog, but what do they want the gold for?nWhat exactly are they planning on buying from the afterlife? Same question Ingot about these Nazi zombies! And why did they turn into zombies? It’s as ifnFranco simply wants us to take for granted the whole Nazi Zombie premise, because it’s a sub-genre, andnNazi zombies simply are? Come on, that’s some lazy writing right there, ifnthere was even any writing involved, which by the looks of things I seriouslyndoubt.
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nFunny thing about this poster for Oasis of the Zombies, there are no tanks, no graveyards, and no zombies shooting guns in this movie! At all!
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nIt doesn’t surprise me that this ultra cheap-onzombie movie was such a bore, it was written and directed by Jesus Franco, thensame guy who wrote Zombie Lake, the most boring zombie flick I’ve evernseen. I guess I knew going in the kindnof film I was getting myself into, and I was absolutely right. I’m still goingnto watch some Jesus Franco films, Vampyros Lesbos (1971) looks good, and I’mnsure Franco has some more good ones in his roster, but Oasis of the Zombies was a complete disappointment.nIt does have a couple of cool shots of zombies walking in the dessert dunes,nand some of the zombies are cool looking, but these few scenes do not save thenfilm from what it is: a complete waste of time. I gave it the benefit of thendoubt and it failed to surprise, shock, or entertain, three things a zombie filmnshould always aim to do. My advice is skip this one, you’ll be doing yourself anfavor.
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nRating: 1 outnof 5
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