July 25 – Talk in an Elevator Day

nPostednon July 25, 2014

Notice how blank and expressionless
everyone’s face is…

nHavenyou ever noticed that many times people ride up elevators togethernpretty much silently, each person facing forward and not reallynlooking at one another?

nOfncourse, this is not a hard-and-fast rule. Many times people arenriding in elevators with people they know, and they enter thenelevator talking to one another, and they keep talking all the way upnor down.
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nActually, sometimes I wish that people in elevators were anlittle MORE silent!

nAlso,nmost people murmur quiet polite phrases such as “Good morning,”n“Excuse me,” “Floor 3, please,” and “Thank you.”

This is NOT how people ride in elevators.
This looks posed….and WEIRD!

nButnmost of the time, a group of strangers will ride together withoutnlooking at or speaking to one another. And even when we are ridingnwith a friend plus strangers, we tend to talk only quietly to ournfriend or stop talking for the duration of the ride.

nThenstudy of “proxemics” tells us about the unwritten rules ofnsociety, including how close people get to one another andnbody-language cues. n

nNormally,nstrangers in public keep ten or more feet away from one another, whennpossible. However, on crowded city streets or enclosed spaces such asnelevators, that obviously is not possible.

nInnan elevator with only a few people, each person tends to stand in hisnor her own corner, with as much space between them as possible. Butnwhen an elevator fills up, people jostle and adjust their positionsnto maintain maximum space between them. n

nWaysnof coping with too-small of personal space include reducing orneliminating hand and arm movements, lowering voice or not talking,nand decreasing eye contact. n

nApparently,nmen tend to not look at others in a crowded elevator at all, butnwomen tend to quickly check out who they are sharing the elevatornwith—just a quick glance around, usually accompanied by a smile. n

Todaynwe are urged to break the unspoken rule about not speaking – and tonmake polite, light small talk on an elevator. Compliment a stranger,nchat about the weather, ask for directions, etc. Does it take couragenfor you to do this? What do other passengers do when you talk –- donthey join in? Look away? Shift uncomfortably? n

nBynthe way, if there is a baby or small child – or maybe even a dog –nin the elevator, complimenting him, her, or it is probably theneasiest way to start a conversation. My husband often tells parents,n“You have a beautiful family,” and people warm right up to him.

nAlsonon this date:
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