February 13 - Get a Different Name Day

nPosted on February 13, 2019

Key points

nToday’s silly holiday could actually be quite serious…

n…Because some people really do feel like the names they were given at birth just don’t match who they really are.

n…Because some people need to distance themselves from their surnames (last names).

n…Because some people need to reclaim a name they or their family had formerly given up.

In some ways, names don’t seem all that important. If your best friend were called “Chris” instead of whatever name he/she/they actually has, would it change your feelings about that friend? You know, as Shakespeare said, “A rose by any other name would smell as sweet.”

nBut of course names are in many ways incredibly important. Here are some reasons why:

nNames often tie us to our ethnic heritage. Fujikawa is a Japanese name; Karlsson is a Swedish name; Rodriguez is a Latin American (or Spanish or Filipino) name; Mwangi is a Kenyan (or East African) name.

nNames tie us to our families. Given names (first names) are often passed down from generation to generation, and of course surnames (last names) are as well.

Our names (including given names, surnames, and nicknames) can give people their first impression of us. They might be the first thing noticed on college or job applications, in essay contests and resumes; even in personal meetings, when we are seen before our name is heard, our name can impact how others respond to us, for better or worse.

n(I actually feel quite glad that some colleges and employers have workers cover names and addresses before decision makers first see applications, so that unconscious bias doesn’t creep in – but of course, not all of them do this!)

nHaving a special nickname can signal acceptance. Some groups have a culture in which the community gives newcomers nicknames…once they feel comfortable enough with a newcomer to give the signal, “you’re one of us.”

Many people in the military
gain nicknames from their
companions. Pictured above
is the fictional character Walter
O’Reilly; others called him “Radar.”

nHere are some reasons people change one or more of their names:

nTo signal a new family structure. Sometimes a person takes his/her/their new spouse’s surname, and sometimes

ntwo spouses change both names, often by hyphenating two surnames. Often an adopted child gets a new surname, and sometimes a divorced person decides to reclaim her/his/their original surname.

nTo distance oneself from the past. Some African American people choose to ditch a name that surely came from a white person, likely a slaveowner. Some people decide to change their name because of a terrible event that continues to haunt them or because it is linked with someone so famous, and so hated, that it makes life unbearable. (Like, having the surname Hitler would be terrible.)

Boxing legend Muhammad
Ali called his birth name,
Cassius Clay, a “slave name.”

nTo reclaim a name or one’s heritage. Some people choose to reclaim a name that was ditched (or mangled) when their families immigrated. Or they reclaim a name from their likely culture, if their ancestors were enslaved and there is no record of those ancestors’ homelands or names.

Jennifer Aniston’s grandfather
changed his family’s name from Anastasakis
to Aniston when they immigrated to
the U.S. from Greece.

nTo differentiate oneself. People might change their name because there are a bajillion other people with the same name (John Smith!), or because someone famous in their field has the same name. Actors have to have a unique name when they sign up for the Screen Actors Guild, so if someone with their name is already a member, they’re gonna need a new name.

Emily Stone was already a member
of SAG when this actor tried to join;
so the actor we know and love as
Emma Stone was born!

nTo keep working life separate from private life. Some people adopt a pen name or a stage name for this reason.

It might not surprise you that
“Dr. Seuss” is a pen name.

nTo have a name that better matches one’s gender or age. Transexual people often choose names that better match their genders, and some people choose to ditch names (like Billy) or nicknames (like Baby) they feel they’ve outgrown.

nTo ditch a misspelling, or because others are always and forever misspelling or mispronouncing (or both!) one’s name. Parents have to fill out birth certificates when they have just had a thrilling and exhausting experience (giving birth), and sometimes they make mistakes. Like Bobie or Boobie instead of Bobbie. (A real example!) And some names are just hard to spell (like Gouin, which has four vowels in a row), or hard for many pronounce, and some folks get sick of that whole thing.

Comedian Louis C.K. was born Louis Szekely.

nOprah’s birth certificate says Orpah Winfrey.

nTo ditch a ridiculous or hurtful or awful name and nickname. A lot of people live with (maybe even are proud of) names that other people make fun of, but if your last name is “Butt” or you were given the legal name “Baby Girl” or everybody in your life calls you “Donut,” you have every right to take legal steps to change your name and/or to inform your family and friends that you will no longer answer to a particular name.