In Paris this week, unions, Communists, and the religion of peace celebrated the traditional Mayday holiday by marching against their unjust oppression while totally NOT setting cops, shopping carts, cars, and random passersby on fire.
Masked cowards did NOT threaten foreign journalists who tried to use their phone cameras to record them while they were totally NOT acting like Daleks in dirty sarouel pants.
Look over there! Marine Le Pen’s dad just said something racist. I think someone in the Front National talked to ISIS once. Here come the Russians! Isn’t Emmanuel Macron a sexy boy? He won the debate because we said so!
Make sure all hijabs are secured safely in place before takeoff. Have a great election and vote Airstrip One.
