24 of the Oddest and Strangest Creatures from Filmland (Part 3)

nA scene from Ghoulies II (1988)

nIt seems like you guys can’t get enough of these monstersnfrom filmland series of articles so here my friends, I give to you anotherninstallment for your reading pleasure! This article is is filled with some truly strange cinematicnbeings, hope you enjoy it!

nFilm: The Resurrected (1992)

nCreature: Mutant Experiment

nDescription: This film is based on H.P. Lovecraft’s ‘ThenStrange Case of Charles Dexter Ward’ and is basically about a scientist who isnexperimenting with a chemical that can help him achieve everlasting life.nBasically he’s found a way to transfer himself onto another body. But like allnmad scientists, he makes a couple of mistakes along the way and the resultingnmistakes are the horribly disfigured creature you see pictured above, which thengood doctor keeps hidden away in a dark, dank dungeon beneath his laboratory.

nQuote: “I think you’ve found a way to live forever…but it’snmessy”

nFilm: Gremlins 2: The New Batch (1990)

nCreatures: The Gremlins

nDescription: This movie is one big love letter to monsternmovies. It seems director Joe Dante wanted to cram as many monsters as he couldnonto this one; the result is literally hundreds of variations of Gremlins.nWhere in the first film most of the Gremlins looked pretty much the same (savenfor their leader ‘Striper’ who had a white mohawk) on this sequel there’s sonmany different types of Gremlins, you’ll have a hard time keeping track ofnthem. Let’s see…we get the ‘Veggie Gremlin’ ‘Lady Gremlin’ ‘Talkative Gremlin’n‘Spider Gremlin’ the ‘Bat Gremlin’ to name but a few.

nQuote: “All they have to do is eat three or four childrennand there would be the most appalling publicity”

nFilm: Q: The Winged Serpent

nCreature: Q: The Winged Serpent

nDescription: This film comes to us from Larry Cohen, thendirector responsible for such films as It’s Alive (1974) and its sequels, andnThe Stuff (1985), which of course means your in B-Movie territory, and that’snall Q: The Winged Serpent aims to be, and achieves it. A giant winged serpentnis flying through the New Yorknskies snatching people from the rooftops of buildings and eating them! It’s upnto an ex-con piano player to help the NYPD find the creatures nest and stop thencreature from killing any more New Yorkers.

nQuote: “Eat em! Eat em! Crunch! Crunch!”

nFilm: The Never Ending Story (1984)

nCreature: Morla – The Ancient One

nDescription: This film is filled with creatures left andnright, but one of the ones that always stuck to my head was Morla, the giantnturtle. You see, in the film, Atreyu the films hero needs to find informationnabout how to stop ‘The Nothing’ a big black cloud that is devouring the land of ‘Fantasia’ and itsnMorla ‘The Ancient One’ who sends Atreyu in the right direction. She is sonancient that she knows everything, unfortunately she doesn’t care very muchnabout anything either! Another problem is that she talks really slow and isnallergic to youth! You don’t want to be standing in front of Morla when shensneazes; just ask Atreyu who gets hurled a couple of feet in the air when Morlansneezes on him!

nQuote: “We don’t even care whether or not we care”

n Film: Night of the Demon (1957)

nCreature: The Demon

nDescription: On this film we meet Dr. John Holden, a man whondoes not believe in the supernatural. He’s such an incurable skeptic that hengoes to a symposium on the supernatural simply to expose a Dr. Julian Karswell,nthe leader of a satanic cult. He is such a skeptic that he accepts an invitationnto stay at Dr. Karswell’s mansion. Problem is that Karswell is the real deal,nand the supernatural is real! So, looking for a way to kill Dr. John Holden,nDr. Julian Karswell slips Holden a magical parchment that assures whoever isnholding it a quick death at the hands of the demon you see pictured above.nOriginally director Jaques Tourneur didn’t want to reveal the demon at anynmoment during the film, he wanted to make a more psychological film, but at theninsistence of the films producers, he found himself obligated to show thencreature, which of course is great because we got yet another memorablencreature to place in the annals of Hollywoodnhorror.

nQuote: “But where does imagination end and reality begin?nWhat is this twilight, this half world of the mind that you profess to know sonmuch about? How can we differentiate between the powers of darkness and thenpowers of the mind? ”

nFilm: Mom and Dad Save the World (1992)

nCreature: Deadly Alien Mushrooms

nDescription: This movie is one of the craziest movies younwill ever see. It is a mixture between science fiction, fantasy and comedy thatnis so underrated it’s not even funny. It is not an intelligent film (in factnfar from it) but then again, that’s exactly the kind of film it wants to be. Tonme Mom and Dad Save the World has always felt like something straight out ofnMonty Python, or perhaps it feels like something that Terry Gilliam would havendirected, while high on weed. The film tells the story of Emperor Tod Spengo, andictator who with the help of a very powerful microscope catches a glimpse atnMarge and Dick Nelson, a regular every day middle class couple who are about tonembark on a summer vacation. Unfortunately, Spengo immediately falls in lovenwith Marge and so with the help of a very powerful magnet Spengo brings Dicknand Marge to his planet so he can marry Marge, kill Dick and destroy the Earth!nAmongst the many creatures we meet in this film (of which there are many trustnme!) we meet the deadly mushrooms you see pictured above. At first they looknkind of cute, but when they start hopping and opening those gaping jaws, you won’tnfeel they are so cute anymore.

nQuote: “Did I mention we were a planet of Idiots?”

nFilm: Cats Eye (1985)

nCreature: Air Stealing Troll

nDescription: This is a film composed of various stories thatnare all connected by this cat that roams through all the stories. One of thenstories is about this little girl who goes to sleep one night and is visited bynthis evil looking little troll who likes to steal the breath from little girls…untilnthey die! Apparently, this is what this little creature enjoys doing. Sonanyways, the cat serves as the little girls protector, the little girl isnplayed by none other than a very young Drew Barrymore.

nFilm: Krull (1983)

nCreature: The Beast

nDescription: This film is all about ‘The Beast’, a creaturenwho flies around space on his flying fortress, searching for worlds to conquernand for the one female who will be his Queen. The Beasts fortress appears andndisappears out of thin air, which makes it difficult to catch this villain. Butnfear not! A group of heroic people decide to take The Beast on, and so theynembark on a journey to find ‘The Glave’ a mythical weapon that can destroy ThenBeast. The film is filled with many creatures, including flying horses, giantnspiders, Cyclops and blind sorcerers. The Beast itself is portrayed verynvaguely in the film, often times it is seen in shadows or in a distortednfashion, but once in a while we get a good glimpse at it, especially towardsnthe ending of the film.

nQuote: “I will allow you to go wherever you please withinnthese walls; for this is the place from which you will rule this world andncountless others. You cannot escape me, you will be my queen”

nFilm: House 2: The Second Story (1987)

nCreature: Zombie Cowboy

nDescription: Many love the first House (1986) because it isnone of those monster filled movies from the 80’s that had tons of make upneffects and was heavy on the fun factor. It was a none stop roller coaster ridenof ghosts, creatures and vengeful zombies from Vietnam! The second film was a bitndifferent because it turned out to be too sweet when compared to the secondnone, which was more of a horror film. This ‘Second Story’ has the same basicnpremise of a house that opens portals to other dimensions, but it’s morencentered on adventure and even romance, it kind of feels a little bit like annIndiana Jones movie. But fear not horror fans! There’s a bit of horror to thisnmovie in the form of the Zombie Cowboy you see pictured above, he hungers fornthe magical skull that can help him live forever. Above all things this skullncowboy simply looks cool! I also loved the idea of him riding on a zombienhorse! The film has a couple of other cool creatures, amongst them anpterodactyl, a zombie grandpa and a worm/dog, which is pretty weird on itsnown.

nQuote: “Look at me, I’m a 170 year old fart, I’m a god damnnzombie!”

n Film: Big Trouble in Little China (1986)

nCreature: Sewer Monster/Chinese Wild Man

nDescription: Honestly, I call this one the monkey monster,nbut I don’t know what the hell it is. If you ask John Carpenter though, he willntell you exactly what it is. According to Carpenters script for Big Trouble innLittle China this creature is “The most horrific creature…thing…abomination younever saw. An unnatural monster of myth and legend, a Chinese wild man made ofnflesh and blood, with long twisted locksnof fire red hair, yellow teeth and yellow eyes…the claws on his fingers thatndig into Gracie’s arm recalling only death…” so there you have it ladies andngentlemen. The problem is that if you haven’t read the script for Big Trouble,nthen you won’t have an iota of an idea what this creature is, it’s existence isnnever explained in the film, it simply is a monster. But whatever, who caresnwhat it is, it looks monstrous and cool, like most of the monsters in BignTrouble in Little China, they defy definition.

nQuote: “But I do know this is a pretty amazing planet wenlive on here and a man would have to be some kind of fool to think were allnalone in this universe!”

nFilm: Beetlejuice (1986)

nCreatures: Adam and Barbara Maitland Ghosts

nDescription: The Maitland’s have just died, and right in thenmiddle of their home renovations too! To make matters worse, now they got thenDeetz’s moving into the home they worked so hard on! What’s this ghost couplento do? Scare the Deetz’s right out of their house that’s what! Problem is theyndon’t know much about being ghosts or scaring people, so it takes a few triesnto figure out a way to scare the Deetz’s. One of the many things they try is stretchingntheir faces out of proportion until they become the hideous visages you seenpictured above.

nQuote: “Barb honey, we’re dead. I don’t think we have muchnto worry about anymore”

nFilm: Leprechaun (1993)

nCreature: The Leprechaun

nDescription: Back in 1993, when I was in high school, my highnschool buds and gals wanted to go to the theater to see a scary movie. We hadnto decide between Bram Stoker Dracula or Leprechaun. I’d read an article onnFangoria and seen some pictures of the make up effects so I thought Leprechaunnmight be a better choice so my friends trusted me, the film geek of the classnto make the choice, so I went with Leprechaun. You probably know how this storynends. By the end of the film people were kicking my ass over how shitty thisnmovie had been. Ha! I still wonder how the hell this film got a theatricalnrelease, but it did, and I fell for the publicity push, sometimes the picturesnin a magazine will make a film look better it actually is. Still, no matter hown‘bad’ these films might be considered, they’ve had a long run. Leprechaunnspawned tons of cheap ass yet fun straight to video sequels and a remake on thenhorizon! I guess people like how the Leprechaun cracks jokes every time he’sngoing to kill somebody. Come to think of it, in a strange way, The Leprechaunnfilled the void that the old Freddy Krueger left when he changed into thenunfunny Freddy he is today. Kudos to Warwick Davis who’s gone on to play ThenLeprechaun for so many years.

nQuote: “Try as they will, try as they might, who steals mengold won’t live through the night”

nFilm: Deep Rising (1998)

nCreature: Giant Octopus

nDescription: So this film is basically about this giantnoctopus thing that invades a cruise ship on its inaugural run and little by littleneats every single person on it! In other words, lot’s of gruesome moments arenwaiting for you with this film. The creature is an awesome one to behold fornvarious reasons, number one its huge! It has numerous tentacles and a scarynlooking gigantic mouth filled with pointy teeth! In order convey the awesomenscale of the creature, the filmmakers used two methods: miniatures of the ship,ncomplete with thousands of skeletons and corpses from the people that thencreature had fed upon, and number two, they had Rob Bottin, make up effectsnmaster and monster connoisseur design the thing. The result? A very impressivenmovie monster!

nQuote: “I don’t mean to sound like a pussy, but this shitsnstarting to freak me out man!”

nFilm: Dragonslayer (1981)

nCreature: Vermithrax Pejorative

nDescription: ‘Vermithrax Pejorative’ is the name thenfilmmakers behind Dragonslayer gave to the dragon that appears on the film. Inlike it, it’s weird, and it’s catchy. And in my opinion, old Vermithrax is thenbest damn dragon I’ve seen on any film, and there have been some cool ones outnthere, but Vermithrax takes the taco as the meanest baddest, most realistic onenof the bunch. Kudos to the filmmakers for making such a great looking monsternway back in 1981, when there was no such thing as computer generated images.nThe dragon was achieved through the use of various effects techniques such asnstop motion animation, puppets, animatronics, and miniature work. A trulynamazing piece of work, and a vastly underrated film. Dragonslayer remains onenof my favorite fantasy films of all time. n

nQuote: “In fact, if it weren’t for sorcerers, there wouldn’tnbe any dragons. Once, the skies were dotted with them. Magnificent hornednbacks, leathern wings, soaring…and their hot breathed wind. Oh, I know thisncreature of yours…Vermithrax Pejorative. Look at these scales, these ridges.nWhen a dragon get’s this old, it knows nothing but pain. It grows, decrepit,ncrippled, pitiful, spiteful! ”

nFilm: Howard the Duck (1986)

nCreature: Dark Overlords of the Universe

nDescription: The Dark Overlords of the Universe are thesendemon-like creatures that come from a place called “Nexus of Sominus” ornsomething like that and they want to come to earth and take over. In order tondo so, they need to use a machine that these human scientists have created thatncan open worm holes to other parts of the universe! These Dark Overlords looknlike a mix between a giant crab and a giant scorpion…on acid! They can shootnparalyzing rays of energy from their tail! They shoot tentacles from theirnclaws! They can blow things up with their eyes! They are monstrous in nature,nbut in order to hide their true form, they can hide inside of a human body. Thesencreatures were brought to life through the magic of stop motion animation bynthe hands of the great Phil Tippett, one of the few stop motion animationnmasters left on this planet. Tippett’s crossed the frontier from stop motion toncomputer animation, sadly, but I loved the stuff he used to do with this artnform in films like Willown(1988) and Robocop 2 (1990). The Dark Overlords of the Universe are just one ofnhis many stop motion animation creations.

nQuote: “I have disguised my true form, which would benconsidered hideous and revolting here”

nFilm: Willown(1988)

nCreature: The Eborsisk

nDescription: The Eborsisk is a two headed dragon that isnborn out of magic. Willownis a sorcerer’s apprentice who’s desperate; he needs something to give him thenupper hand in the fight against Bavmorda’s henchmen; so he uses the corpse of antroll to concoct this strange creature with the help of a magical wandnbelonging to a good witch called ‘Cherlindrea’. So it’s because of Willow that The Eborsisk comes to be! Coolest part about the monster is not that it’s andragon, but that it’s a fire breathing dragon! Unfortunately, The Eborsisk doesn’tnknow good guys from bad guys, so even the good guys end up fighting against it.n

nQuote: “Don’t play with that wand, its got vast powers! Onlyna real sorcerer can use it, not a stupid peck like you!”

nFilm: Clash of the Titans (1981)

nCreature: Medussa

nDescription: Medussa is also known as ‘The Gorgon’, one looknfrom her eyes will turn any man who looks into stone. Her blood is so venomous,nthat it will in fact melt metal! Oh and another thing, she has snakes on hernhead! On the film, Perseus, the son of Zeus must cut off her head to use it asna weapon against the all powerful six armed under water behemoth known as ThenKraken. Medusa has appeared in various films dealing with Greek Mythologynamongst them Percy Jackson and the Lightning Thief (2010) and the new Clash ofnthe Titans (2010), but even though these more recent versions use betterneffects, I still find Ray Harryhausen’s portrayal of the character to be thenbest, it’s just so spooky!

nQuote: “You must win Medussa’s head. She’s not going to givenit to you as a present. As difficult and as dangerous as to vanquish a thousandnKraken’s!”

nFilm: Ghostbusters (1984)

nCreature: Slimer

nDescription: This ghastly creature is a harmless littlenghost that starts out by spooking the Ghostbusters when they first encounternhim in the hallway of a haunted hotel. It is Peter Venkman who has a closenencounter with it. He is not an evil entity like most of the ghosts that thenGhostbusters have to deal with, all Slimer cares about is eating. Strange partnis that since he has no stomach (remember, Slimer’s a ghost) when he eatsnanything it just falls right to the floor. He is known for running straightninto human beings and sliming them with his protoplasmic residue. BynGhostbusters II, slimmer is sort of a pet to the Ghostbusters, apparently it regularlynresides at the Ghostbusters HQ

nQuote: “He slimed me!”

nFilm: Army of Darkness (1993)

nCreature: Demonite and Pit Hag/Witch

nDescription: Again, this is another film filled with strangencreatures, but these two stand out amongst all the others. The Pit Hag isnawesome, it’s this witch who apparently lives in a dungeon filled with water,nwaiting for her masters to through tender morsels like Ashley J. Williams, alsonknown as ‘Ash’, down to her. She has white eyes, huge claws and a big ass haid,nshe’s also going bald for some reason, I guess she must be reaching middle age.nThen we have this Demonite thing that snatches Ash’s mid-evil girlfriend Sheilanand whisks her away to the hands of ‘Evil Ash’ the leader of the titular Armynof Darkness, I love this creature because it’s got a very demonic look to it.

nQuote: “Into the pit with those blood thirsty sons ofnwhores!”

nFilm: King Kong (2005)

nCreature: Giant Man Eating Worms

nDescription: When I first saw this movie I was blown away bynthese scenes that take place in Skulln Island because it felt tonme as if on that island one could not stand still without some creature tryingnto kill you or eat you in one way or another. Out of the many creatures wenencounter in Skulln Island we have thesenreally freaking weird giant worms. What freaked me out about them is that theynmove about so slowly that you wouldn’t expect them to be so deadly. But littlenby little they creep up on you until suddenly they are wrapped around your bodynand eating you alive, these creatures truly freaked me the hell out!

nQuote: “Monsters belong in B-Movies”

nFilm: Men in Black 3 (2012)

nCreature: Boris the Animal

nDescription: These Men in Black films are filled to the brimnwith tons of aliens and monsters, but Boris the Animal was one of my favoritesnfrom this third film. What made him stand out? Well, for starters he is sondangerous that he has to be kept in a high security prison…on the moon! Second,nhe can shoot these bones out of his hands, that shoot out as if they were bullets.nIf he gets caught up in trouble, these spiderlike creatures crawl out of hisnhands and save him…he also time travels and has an awesome chopper; he ends upnbeing one of the most formidable villains that J and K ever faced.

nQuote: “Look at you, every mistake I ever made just waitingnto happen!”

nIf you enjoyed this article, you might enjoy parts I and IInwhich showcase even more strange creatures from filmland!